This is the Way to Get A Woman

Me to Thing 1(9 yrs old): When you recite your poem you have to look your teacher in the eyes or you will get marked down.

Thing 1: But I don't like making eye contact.

Me: Well, it is an important skill you have to learn in life.

(As often happens, Thing 2 interjects some interesting comment into the conversation)

Thing 2 (7yrs): Yeah, if you want to get an attractive woman someday you have to make eye contact. 

Well, there you go. 

Based on the awkward stance and distance between T2 and the neighbor girl on the first day of school  I don't think I need to worry about him bringing home an attractive woman quite yet.

But I look forward to meeting her when that day comes.