At each stop the dog jumped out of the van and tried to get hit by a car. Our final stop turned into the typical longer-than-expected trip to get groceries. Halfway through grabbing "just a few things" we had to make an emergency stop at the bathroom (why do they always wait until we are at the opposite end of the bathrooms to have to go RIGHT NOW?). Groceries bought and two penny pony rides later, we rush back out to the van where I hoped the dog hadn't done anything smelly.
As I lift the 100 lb cooler bag of groceries out of the cart the dog makes a break for it. I drag the bag toward the dog and grab her by the collar with my free hand. At THIS EXACT MOMENT (I'm about to lose my witness here...) a grumpy old man pulls up and stops behind my van. He angrily lectures me on my bad parking skills (I readily admit I'm a terrible parker) informing me he could barely get out of his space next to mine. I think to myself at this moment...are you kidding me? Can you see what I'm managing right now? Somewhat politely I say, "I'm sorry sir but I have other ISSUES to deal with right now."
I turn away and wrestle the dog with one hand back into the van. When I drag my 1000 lb grocery bag back to the van the grumpy old man is STILL parked there glaring at me. My witness slips a bit more and I say, "What do you want me to do?" (clearly he was able to get out of his spot without incident). He says something else I can't remember to which I reply, "Well I'll go to parking school, okay?!" He snaps, "Good, you should." I yell, "Great, you can pay for it!" He finally departs and I call him a jerk under my breath right in front of my kids.
Nice. What happened to loving my neighbor? I even got up early and had a quiet time this morning! As I drive home I think to myself, This is why I can never put one of those fish on my van.
But here is the amazing thing that I'm still trying to get my head around. Something that I think is so very important for all of us who claim to love God to really grasp. 2 Corinthians 5:21 says, "For our sake he made him to be sin who knew no sin, so that in him we might become the righteousness of God." Jesus took on all my sin and in exchange He credited His righteousness to me. God doesn't look down on me in that parking lot frowning in disgust that I STILL don't get it right. He looks down to see Christ's righteousness and my mistakes already paid for on the cross.
It's that perfect love of the Father that motivates to do better next time, not out of guilt, only out of pleasure and delight in His perfect acceptance of me, just as I am. And if I ever do make it to "parking school" maybe I can finally put that fish on my bumper...or, maybe not!
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