Did God Send His Son to Kindergarten?

Did God ever send His Son to Kindergarten?  This morning Thing 3 teared up and told me he was going to miss me at K.  My resolve to send him trembled along with my heart; I pulled him into my lap for a long hug.  I know God never sent His Son to K, but that doesn’t mean He can’t understand my heart today.  In fact, this ache helps me understand His Heart a little more. 

I sent T3 off today hoping he will make new friends, be accepted, run and laugh and play and learn.  God sent His Son off without a single hope that He would experience any of those things in this world. What parent would willingly send their child out knowing they would be persecuted, despised and rejected?  Does this make God callous and cruel? Or does it reveal the depth of His love?

God knew Jesus would land in the middle of a mad man’s mass murder plot right from birth.  And His life would end, temporarily, on earth with His eventual torture and murder some thirty years later.  How much harder must it have been to send Him, the exact imprint of His image, into the world knowing all the rejection and pain He would endure? Why would a loving parent do this? 

God also knew the only way to get all His children back was to sacrifice His perfect Son to make atonement for us all. All in order to send me, and all the world, a message.  I miss you.  I love you.  I want you back.  I want it so badly I’m giving up the one Perfect relationship I have in order to restore all our relationships.

And after Jesus endured the cross, making purification for My sins, He returned to sit down at the right hand of His Father.  Me, I ‘m just looking forward to T3 returning in a few hours and sitting down to a pb and j together.  And in the in between time, with every little pang of separation, I’m reminded of His incredible LOVE for me…for us and the separation He endured on my behalf.

How Deep the Father’sLove for Us

How Deep the Father’s Love for us

How Vast beyond all measure

That He should give His only Son

And make a wretch His treasure

How great the pain of searing loss

The father turns His face away

As wounds that mar the Chosen one

Bring many son’s to glory

Little Steps to Big Things - Sending my Youngest to K

If you were to open my chest and see my heart, what would you see today?  This first day where all my little chicks are off on their own.  My youngest gently but firmly explained yesterday on our way to share the first day of K that he needs his space.  In 5 yr old words, but with the wisdom of someone much older, he knew I needed that little talk.  And as his teacher explained to the class that the first day is the hardest and each day will get better, I stood in the back and tried to believe her.

If you could see ache, that is what you would see.  Ache that my little man isn’t with me; my sidekick these past 5 years.  Ache over his sweet words during an early morning snuggle last week, “I love you, mommy.  I’m going to miss you when I’m at K.”  Ache from holding back the words, “Let’s just put it off one more year, shall we?!” I know deep down past that ache he really is ready to go. 

And even though he will miss me and I’ll miss him, I know these little steps away from me are so very important. I know those little boy legs sticking out from that big backpack will carry him confidently to run, jump, interact and discover what life is like apart from me.

I know these steps into K lead to bigger strides into 1 – 12^th grade and beyond.  And by enduring the ache and letting go of his hand I’m saying goodbye to my baby and hello to the man he is growing into a little more each day.  A man of character and godliness, of compassion and grace.  A leader and follower, a husband and father….to hopefully lots of little girls!

As I let go I run to the Arms of the One I’ve clung to all along.  I relish in the quiet.  I soak up the beauty around me. 

I meditate on His words of Love to me.  I reflect on my failures and delight in His grace.  I plead for my sons’ protection and growth.  I thank Him for His tender love and guidance.  And I wonder, now that my hand is free of all the sticky little hands I love the most, at least for 3 hours a day, what will He Guide me to do?  What is the best use of my time? Where can I make the biggest contribution to His Kingdom.  I picked up a copy of this new book, my first reading assignment.

I know I want to make a weekly 3 hour date with Him.  I want to write words that will encourage others while sorting out my own heart.  And I want to invest in someone else – if for nothing else than to guard against making this all about me.  But for today my time is up…it’s time to go hold that little hand a lot more. J

How to Not be a Jerk (or Jerkette)

...that was the working title of my new booklet. :) It got tweaked a bit and the real title is, "How to Talk to Women: Why it Get's Awkward. How to Talk to Men: Why we Emotionally Attach."  We released it in May but with all our travels I'm just posting about it. 

My target audience is mid-teens through 20s, but really anyone who interacts with the opposite sex could benefit from it, single or married.  It is short (44 pages) and compact in size (4x6) intentionally so it can be read through in one sitting or in a discipleship setting.

I learned a lot in this writing-for-print process (i.e., this was realllllly stretching for me!) Thankfully God provided all the right people with the know-how to get it done in time. More than once I remember throwing up overwhelmed prayers for guidance. Time and again God put the right people in place to help.

Among those answered prayers were some very helpful folks at NavPress (who helped with editing and all sorts of printing, paper and layout advice).  He even provided a friend who knows Jerry Bridges to get the foreword written.  Wow!  My writing group along with a few other pre-readers provided lots of helpful feedback. And I tested my friendship a bit with my takented graphic designer friend, Virginia, to get an awesome cover design. Only in God's perfect timing could this have all come together.

 If you would like a copy or know someone who might please email: emotionalintegrity@gmail.com.  They are $3.

Would you do me a sweet favor and "share" this post to spread the word?  And say a little prayer that it will bless the folks who read it as they pursue healthy, freeing and honoring relationships with the opposite sex. Thanks!

Packing with Kids

We were blessed to make 4 separate trips - 3 of them for ministry -  this summer.  We saw so many old friends and made plenty new ones.  But that meant 4 different times to perfect the art of packing three boys and everything we would need for the next 3 -14 days.

On the first trip I quickly made out a list for the older two Things to pack on their own.  20 plus hours in the car later we are unpacking at our hotel in the CA desert and T2 announces he doesn't have any shorts.  It's over 100 degrees outside.  Wonderful.  Later at home I reread my list, sure enough, shorts were not on it, but his swimsuit was, so he put that on until we could make it somewhere to buy shorts.

I offered to step down from being in charge of packing but hubby declined my resignation.

Shortly after returning from that trip we left for a weekend up in the mountains.  We had several unexpected and costly delays but we made it in time to teach that night...just barely.  After a quick dinner we unloaded the Things and their bags out of the jeep and hubby says, "I don't see thing 3's bag."  Huh.  I KNOW I packed his bag.  I inspected everyone's bags.  Apparently I didn't carry his bag DOWNSTAIRS though like the other 2 had already done.  So there we are about to go teach on healthy relationships to 70 collegiates and staff and the tension is thick between us.  Hubby says, "I didn't forget it." (To be fair, he denies making that comment but I know it was awkwardly addressed who had in fact left his bag behind).  I breathed deeply and said, "Neither did I....T3 Did!" We said no more and went off to our workshop.

Again I tendered my resignation from being in charge of packing and it was denied.

So off we go for our third trip that summer - this time purely for pleasure into the Rockies.  And I made a through list, checking it twice for the boys to follow.  Day 2 we head up for a 4 1/2 mile hike and T1 announces he never packed his tennis shoes.  Now I KNOW I put them on the list...he just forgot.  He hiked up into the snow in flip flops and never complained.

I don't think I even bothered to try and resign from packing before our 4th and final trip.  I did make a very detailed list with boxes for the Things to check off as they packed them! They did a great job and I check their bags for leaving for another 20 hour drive, this time headed east.  Everything seemed in order until I was finishing up that last load of laundry and noticed one of the boys didn't have any underwear in any of the loads I'd done.  After further interrogation I asked him if he had packed 6 pairs as directed.  He replied that he had indeed.  I asked him where he got 6 pairs...at this point he said he wasn't sure if they were supposed to be clean or dirty so HE PACKED BOTH.

I give up....He was right, I had not specified on the list that the underwear to be packed should be clean...Lord, help me.